Oops, I Burned the Belly

So apparently when you've spent the past 3 years in garments and tankinis that cover your belly and upper thighs, you shouldn't go out and tan relentlessly at high noon like you were a teenager.

I've always known to tan in 10-15 minute increments, but the heart idea was so cute that I wanted it in two days.

I don't think I've had so painful a sunburn in my life (I don't burn- ever.)

Lesson learned- not a teenager, don't tan like a teenager.

As for my over-exposed skin made delicate by summers of being covered? It's been given a bath of apple cider vinegar and slathered in aloe vera, lavender, and grapeseed oil, and I am willing it to heal. I can't go into labor looking like this.

(You are not getting a picture.)