Kaitlyn has been rather mischievous lately. For the past month or so she has been getting into nail polish, lip gloss, hand sanitizer, play dough, lotion, etc. on a daily basis and making messes. I've always prided myself on never having one of those kids, but now it appears I have one. So, yesterday after church we were all going about our business, I was cleaning, Forrest was resting, and the kids were playing independently. They went out in the backyard, and a short while later Kaitlyn appeared in the kitchen asking for a pair of gloves. I directed her to the garage, then upon glancing over noticed a silver chain dangling from her hand. Wait, what was that?
"Come here Kaitlyn."
(Kaitlyn continues to walk towards garage.)
"Kaitlyn, wait a minute (I progress toward her.) What do you have?"
I lift her hands to find my anniversary jewelry dangling, a tangled necklace and one earring... ONE!
Now mind you this is the only real jewelry I possess. It was a set given to me by Forrest for our 5 year wedding anniversary, an aquamarine and diamond studded necklace and earrings with deep sentimental meaning. There was a little story that Forrest told me when he gave me the set, making it all the more special. Anyhow, needless to say, I did not react to the situation calmly. I am sure every neighbor within ear shot heard the words that came spewing out of my mouth as we combed the empty lot next to our house.
I called the jewelry store today and discovered that one little earring is going to be $184 to replace. That was an expensive mistake, one that never should've happened. Forrest maintains that she is 6 years away from the age of accountability, and was able to remain much calmer than I. But seriously, of all the things she could've gotten into, I feel that she crossed the line. How would you have handled the situation?
Lisa, Sometimes I feel like children do as much as possible to make sure that we still love them. She found something shiny and probably wanted to be like mommy. This might not make you feel any better, but I just keep my stuff up high. It's hard because when you are almost 3 money and sentiment don't mean much. You could always see if anyone has a metal detector:) I am sorry. It is times like these I think about the injustice of motherhood. Why the one "real" piece of jewelry.
ReplyDeleteOohhhhh....so sad!!
ReplyDeleteIn the moment or afterwards. Which answer do you want? lol
Thats hard to answer.
On the one hand you want them to understand to respect THINGS around them. But she really could not have known how much that meant to you. And could it (I'm being blunt, but I do not mean to offend) also be somewhat at your fault for having it in a place where she could get it? Think of where her thought process probably was. --Pretty jewelry, mommy wears it, I want to wear it, this is pretty, I want to play with it, lets go outside. I need gloves (lol)--
When I was 12 I broke a mastodon bone. Let me repeat that. I BROKE A MASTODON BONE. Thousands of years old. Completely irreplaceable. To this day I do not remember my mom getting mad but rather expressing how embarrasing it would be to have to tell the person she borrowed it from that it had broken. It was just STUFF albeit irreplaceable. She taught me in that moment that I was more important than the bone I broke. I still learned the lesson I needed to learn as I did feel ashamed because I saw how embarressed my mom was that she was going to have to tell Mr. Bailey it broke, but there was no anger involved. She too was at fault, as it sat on the piano and I did not think that it was special otherwise....why would it be there? I honestly had no idea what it was, she had never spoken of it in our home (it was used for a seminary lesson she taught the previous week).
Perhaps special jewelry like that needs to be talked about. This is special jewelry to mommy (tell them why) this jewelry you can play with but this one you must not touch.
Penny knows which makeup of mine she can play with (if she asks) and which she is not allowed to play with because we've talked about it as I'm getting ready and she's watching.
I dunno. I don't think there is ONE good and perfect answer for this kind of situation. But collectively, you might be able to find something that works well for you.
Hope that helps a little. Eeeeeeeeeek! I hope you can find it.
I've always erred on the side of teaching my kids how to handle things opposed to just putting everything out of reach and "off limits." Like I said, this is a relatively new phase and as such has caught me off guard. It's never been like my children to be mischievous, and that jewelry has been in the same box in my bathroom drawer for 3 years, and has never been touched. I don't do baby locks, I don't hide things, I just teach. This was definitely out of character for her.
ReplyDeleteOh Lisa I feel your pain!!
ReplyDeleteI know it sounds silly but I had this set of scriptures that was my one thing that meant so much to me. Really I don't even know why they were so important other than I gained my testimony reading from them. They were full of markings, lots of love and tears. About a year ago they were distroyed and I was crushed. I still think about them.
With that said I have learned over the years that things are things. We can not take them with us no matter how much they mean to us. The one thing (or six in your case) would be your children.
Your little lady like mine is only two. When Sariah takes Kirk's glasses and snaps them in half, dumps a pitcher of OJ on the carpet, or covers her body in sharpie I remind myself that this too shall pass.
Maybe she needs you to spend a little extra time with her loving on her. Or maybe she is just her own person.
I still have my days that I want to scream because yet another "thing" has been ruined. Then I remind myself that things are things and this is my little angel (cough, cough) forever. She just adds a little adventure to the journey.
Good Luck and I know you will come up with the best answer for your family!
Thats a neat way to put that...."I just teach." Thats exactly what I was trying to say.....you just said it with better words. ;P
ReplyDelete